Escape from Ikea

There is a huge "Big Box" Ikea store along I-95 in New Haven, Ct. It offers a vast array of Scandinavian modern style furniture and accessories. The cavernous first level has floor to ceiling shelves that tower even higher than those in Home Depot and Lowe's. the aisles are filled primarily with eager, smiling young couples frequently with toddlers in strollers. It is a place for first time acquirers. My wife and I go there occasionally, not because we are young and not because we are eager to acquire new "stuff", on the contrary, at our life stage, satisfaction is best achieved when we are successful at discarding old "stuff".

We are attracted to this people magnet, pulled by very different forces than most. It is fun to watch the excited shoppers imagining how their lives will be enriched yet simplified with that unpainted chopping block on wheels with interchangeable shelves. We observe their prospective wish fulfillment in retrospect knowing how those dreams are likely to turn out to be soon outgrown. Then, on those bitter wet days when the weather becomes horrid, Ikeas endless aisles remain dry and snow free for those desperately seeking escape from "cabin fever" and needing a long stretch of substitute track to walk, for the sheer pleasure of the exercise.

But most enticing is the glass enclosed Ikea cafeteria, perched on the side of the second floor overlooking the parking lot, the highway and the more distant New Haven sky line. The lunch or coffee experience there is simply Scandinavian. the area is clean, spacious and user friendly. Weekdays there are best because the place is uncrowded, unrushed, offering great views, help yourself coffee refills and, best of all, the Swedish meatballs.

The one drawback to the whole experience is the signage. Once you enter a section, even if in error, that's it, you are there for the duration. All the exit signs are laid out to force you to cover every square foot of the aisles and to pass every item on display within that section. To follow the exit signs is to agree to a long term commitment, whether or not that is your intention. There are no do-overs, no quick departures permitted. Next time I go I intend to use negative psychology and do the exact opposite of what the exit signs demand and see where I wind up. Hopefully it is not in Sweden.